Infertility's A Bitch

There's no other way to say it. It's a complete and total bitch.  It's been a little over 3 years now since I've been off birth control and we started talking about a baby. I hate even admitting its been that long.  It's the constant elephant in the room and why my blogging has cut back so much.  I don't think anyone can truly understand how painful and isolating infertility can be unless they themselves have been through it. There's not a single day that goes by that I'm not reminded of my inadequacy as a woman. With every month that passes, I'm often left wondering what my purpose here on earth is.

My one Christmas wish this year was two pink lines.  Today I got my period. I wanted so badly to make this the best Christmas for Jason and I yet. I had to take down all my friends Christmas cards off the fridge because its too painful to see all my friends and they're growing families during this holiday season. I must be masochistic because I'm compulsively checking Facebook and seeing Santa pictures with ruffled dresses and little bowties.

I so wish I could see the forest for the trees right now. Instead I see my next refilled prescription of my fourth round of Clomid sitting on my nightstand.

My friends try to support and encourage me, and don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for the support, but at the same time I resent the pity. It's as if I don't realize that when friends are talking about life with their new little ones and then turn to ask about our new puppy, I don't realize what they're doing.  I get it. Shoot, why do you think I wanted a puppy? We're doing our best to distract ourselves, "not stress" and "have fun with it" - but seriously when you're so hopped up on expensive hormones, taking temps every day, scheduling blood tests and peeing on an endless amount of test sticks to check your ovulation, how can you NOT think about it? I swear if one more person tells me that if I "adopt a baby then I'll end up pregnant, cause it happens to people all the time", I'll hit them.  I don't want an adopted baby to feel like our Plan B. And neither one of us is quite ready for that yet.

There are many brave women out there that blog about this unspoken & taboo topic. They're women that have unknowingly encouraged me and made me feel less alone. I want my blog to be that for someone else, instead of only showing how perfect and fun our lives seem to appear all the time. To be honest it's been very hard and difficult on Jason and I. I often wonder what I did to deserve someone who has put up with so much over the last 7 years. I'm tired of pretending that its all sunshine and rainbows. I want to be real so that this blog can be an outlet for my real thoughts and emotions while on this journey of infertility. I'm not trying to air out my dirty laundry or expose anyone, but I'm too candid and honest of a person to put on a facade any longer.

If you feel like these blog entries get too negative at times, then please feel free to read elsewhere. I'm not blogging for anyone's entertainment, but for my own sanity.

Ahhhh... I actually do feel much better now.

Streams In The Desert - December 22

"A thick and dreadful darkness came over him." Genesis 15:12

In this Scripture passage, the sun had finally gone down, and the eastern night had swiftly cast its heavy veil over the entire scene. Worn out by the mental conflict, and the exertion and the cares of the day, Abraham "fell into a deep sleep".  During his sleep, his soul was oppressed with "a thick and dreadful darkness," which seemed to smother him and felt like a nightmare in his heart. 

Do you have an understanding of the horror of that kind of darkness? Have you ever experienced a terrible sorrow that seems difficult to reconcile with God's perfect love - a sorrow that comes crashing down upon you, wrings from your soul its peaceful rest in the grace of God, and casts it into a sea of darkness that is unlit by even one ray of hope?  Have you ever experienced a sorrow caused by unkindness, when others cruelly mistreat your trusting heart, and you even begin to wonder if there is really a God above who sees what is happening yet continues to allow it? If you know this kind of sorrow, then you know something of this "thick and dreadful darkness."

Human life is made of brightness and gloom, shadows and sunshine, and dark clouds followed by brilliant rays of light. Yet through it all, God's divine justice is accomplishing His plan, affecting and disciplining each individual soul. 

Dear friend, if you are filled with fear of the "thick and dreadful darkness" because of God's dealings with humankind, learn to trust His infallible wisdom, for it is equal to His unchanging justice. And know that He who endured the "dreadful darkness" of Calvary and the feeling of having been forsaken on the cross is ready to accompany you "through the valley of the shadow of death" until you can see the sun shining on the other side.

May we realize that "we have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure" and that "it enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain".  And may we know that although it is unseen within His sanctuary, our anchor will be grounded and will never yield. It will hold firm until the day He returns, and then we too will follow it into the safe haven guaranteed to us in God's unchangeable Word - F.B. Meyer

The disciples thought that the angry sea separated them from Jesus.  In fact, some of them thought something even worse - they thought that the trouble they were facing was a sign that He had forgotten them and did not care about them. 

O dear friend, that is when your troubles can cause the most harm. The devil comes and whispers to you, "God has forgotten you" or "God has forsaken you," and your unbelieving heart cries out, as Gideon once did, "If the Lord is with us, why has all this happened to us?" (Judges 6:13).  God has allowed the difficulty to come upon you, in order to bring you closer to Himself. It has come not to separate you from Jesus but to cause you to cling to Him more faithfully, more firmly, and more simply. F.S. Webster

We should abandon ourselves to God more fully at those times when He seems to have abandoned us. Let us enjoy His light and comfort when it is His pleasure to give it to us, but may we not attach ourselves to His gifts.  May we instead attach ourselves to Him, and when He plunges us into the night, where pure faith is required, may we still press on through the agonizing darkness.

Today my sister turns 30!!!

This is my middle sister Kris.  Isn't she gorgeous?

I like to call her - Kris-TIN. It's more fun.

She's always been much smaller than me and even when we were little I liked to pick her up like a rag doll and carry her around the back yard. 

 I mean honestly, how could you not want to pick that little Minnie up and not put her in your pocket?

Even though we're about as different as sisters could be, my mother was right in saying that my sisters would become my best friends. 

We've traveled together, we've cried together, we've lived together and we've grown together.  She inspires me to never give up on my dreams, as she's never given up on hers.

She's shown me how to care less about what others think and more about who I desire to be. She never settles for the status quo.  And she's loyal to almost a fault.

I'm so happy to see her being treated and loved the way she deserves to be.  Amir has been awesome to have in her life and sees her for the treasure she truly is. 

Sister, I hope you have a wonderful day and it pains me that I can't be there to celebrate with you.

I admire you, I love you and I miss you.

Love, Kim

(aka Grandma Scribbles)

I love this kid SO MUCH

17 months ago we met these two cuties.  They happened to be walking by and noticed Jason working on the front sidewalk and asked if they could watch.  Little did we know that this was the beginning of not only a beautiful friendship, but also of a greater understanding of what it means to love like Jesus loved.

On February 17, just 7 months after we met them, Larry lost his father.  He finished out the school year at his Grandparents house and then the courts decided he needed to live with his Aunt across town.  Within a week or so, Jonique moved away to the projects with her mother, step-daddy and baby sister. 

Let's just say, I cried a lot.

I had hoped and prayed that God didn't bring these kids into our lives for such a short time to only have them leave again. 

Thankfully, that hasn't been the case. The first weekend of every month Larry & Jonique spend the weekend with their grandparents, which means they also spend it with us.  I intentionally keep that weekend free and wait with anticipation for that 8am knock on the door Saturday morning.  Somteimes Larry shows up in sweats with a bowl of cereal in hand.  And other times he shows up before breakfast, hangs out and has a little coffee with us, then runs home to grab breakfast and come back.

And occasionally, he calls us mom & dad. 

Jason and I have longed to be parents for a very long time. And until that day comes, God has so blessed us to have the opportunity to spiritually father & mother kids that desperately need it.  I believe we've grown and benefited from these relationships, maybe more than they have. I have a greater understanding of what it means to not just talk about living as Jesus did, but actually doing it.  And that the only true way of reaching someone and showing them who Jesus is - is through relationship.

The picture above of Jason and the kids was taken last Saturday at the Rivergate Skate Center.  Larry asked that we do something fun to celebrate his 13th birthday (which is actually on the 14th), but because he was at Grandma's last weekend, we celebrated it then.  Jason and I piled up the neighborhood kids into 2 cars and headed out to Rivergate and for 3 hours we all had a blast.  I had made carrot cake cupcakes (per Larry's request) and we had pizza, nachos and coke.  I even put on some skates myself and took a few laps!  It's amazing what I'll do for these kids. :-)

This isn't the most flattering pic, but it's the only one I have of the 3 of us AND Jonique took it, so I couldn't hurt her feelings by saying it wasn't good enough. And really, in the large scheme of things - is what matters how we look or the relationship it signifies?

After skating, we all headed back to our house to watch a Christmas movie and play some games on the iPad.  Around 7:30 the kiddos headed home and were anxious to start all over the next day.

Sunday, after Jason and I went to church and had some lunch, I had picked up my friend Robbie to help me work on some sugar cookie dough that Larry had also requested for his birthday. Within a  few minutes we had 2 girls cutting out sugar cookies in the dining room, Robbie (my sweet gay friend that I work with) and I in the kitchen baking and frosting cookies and then 2 boys and Jason in the living room playing games on the iPad.  And to top it all off, within a short time Larry's mom Sonya showed up at our front door with Larry's cousin Tootie.  So naturally I invited them in as well.  It was actually a really awesome thing because over the last 17 months Sonya and I hadn't spoken more than 2 words to each other and here she was in my dining room for almost 2 hours sharing with me about God working in her life, what she learned at church that morning and about her 1 year anniversary coming up in March of being clean. 

God is big.

Fall is my fav!

So far this fall has kicked off to a great start! 
Back when the weather started to cool off from the summer heat and the leaves began to change, my parents came out for a lovely 5 days to enjoy the foliage and get a glimpse into our daily life.

And when I say daily life, what I really mean is a lot of running around, seeing the sights and taking care of our boys.  Even still, we had a wonderful time at Cheekwood Gardens wandering around and enjoying the glorious weather.  

I was able to show my parents around our offices which had been renovated completely a couple years back and Dad took full advantage of our large conference room.

As far as the boys go - they're slowly but surely adapting to each other.  It's definitely taking some time and the constant energy and craziness of the choco-nut wears on the older boys, but they are getting better at accepting him. 

Since the lawncare business has started winding down and Doug (our employee) has been handling the majority of the work load, Jason started on a new and improved doghouse!  He started one years ago back when the pups were still pretty young and it would have ended up being WAY too small, so I'm glad he didn't get around to finishing it.  SO as you can see below, we've upgraded into a MUCH larger doghouse.  The frame is actually from the old aluminum shed we used to have.  He cut the side beams down by about half and has since walled it in with plywood.  The front half of the doghouse will be a covered front porch.  Then when he's finished, we'll paint it to match the house. Our boys are gonna love it!  And I'm blessed to have one talented husband! 

Remember this picture?

We took this when Jeep & Seven were only 9 weeks old! Look how cute they are!  It's been one of our favorite pictures of them, so we knew we had to get one of CJ in the same chair on the front porch too.

 It's been one of our favorite pictures of them, so we knew we had to get one of CJ in the same chair on the front porch too.

Doesn't CJ and Seven look so much alike?

They're very similar in personality too, which is nice cause Seven is way more patient with the little guy than Jeep is. 

Moving on, this weekend I'm heading out to "The Farm" for 2 days of relaxation, reading, sleeping, chocolate-eating and bonding with two very good friends of mine.  I'm stoked that I don't have to think about dog hair, dog poop or dog toys :-)  But I will miss them.  All 4 of my guys actually.

I'm stoked that I don't have to think about dog hair, dog poop or dog toys :-)

But I will miss them. All 4 of my guys actually.

And Then There Were Three

Two nights ago we picked up our third lab, a chocolate puppy we named CJ! He is the sweetest thing ever.  He loves to snuggle and other than a couple small accidents, he's housetrained already.   Jason and I headed down to Chattanooga on Sunday evening and met Susan Ellis of Confederate Labs to pick up our guy at 7 1/2 weeks old.  As soon as we picked him up, we headed down the street to Sonic and spent a little time playing with him and letting him go potty.  

I am so in love.

Here's a video of us playing with him at Sonic in Chattanooga.

He is just the sweetest & cuddliest thing ever!  Three weeks ago we drove down to Chickamauga, GA to see where the puppies are bred and pick out CJ from the litter.  Last time with Jeep & Seven, Jason met the breeder halfway and picked out Jeep & Seven while I was at work.  This time I went along and we played with all the puppies to see which one might be a good fit for our home.  Look how tiny he is! (below)

In the end, I think CJ picked us.  The pic above is when we had all three chocolate males out and were playing with them, when this little guy cuddled right into Jason's side and stayed there completely content.  He was just so darn sweet. 

I mean look at that face?!

As soon as we held him, we just knew that he was our guy.

He even began answering to his name right away!  Below is a video where we (I) played with him for the first time.

Once we had made our decision, we had the breeder mark him just for us! Those little green x's didn't last long though ;-) But even still, he was the largest chocolate male in the litter and the most perfect.

We were very lucky to meet Jeep, Seven & CJ's dad, Jackson (below).  He was so much like Seven in personality and even grunted just like him.  However, Jeep definitely takes after his mama Peaches, who had been given to another family. We also got to meet CJ's mama Missy who's also in the previous video.

Here's a great shot of what I believe is little CJ with his daddy Jackson.

It is so fun, and yet so much work, having a little puppy around again.  More than anything, I really want Jeep & Seven to get used to him.  So far, things have been a little rough.  The boys are extremely threatened and not thrilled at all with having to share Jason and I.  And surprisingly when we introduced them to CJ, instead of CJ rolling over and submitting himself to them, he instead stood his ground and growled and barked at them! haha!! Who knows, we may have a new Alpha in the making! 

One last video - Jeep & Seven meet CJ for the first time :-)



It was a bit scary with the boys being very territorial, but they're warming up veeerrrry slowly. Below is a pic from last night when it was late and we were all sleepy.  Jason fell asleep on Jeep & Seven, and CJ kept trying to snuggle up to Jeep who wasn't having it one bit.  Every time CJ tried to nuzzle Jeep's tail, Jeep would pull further away from him.  Poor little guy, he just wants to be loved. 

Currently

Watching: Greys Anatomy, Private Practice, Parenthood and I'm Having Their Baby.  I heard a rumor that this may be Private Practice's last season and that Addison (Kate Walsh) is leaving the show.  I would seriously freak out if that is the case, since PP is one of my all-time favorite shows ever.  I recently started getting into I'm Having Thier Baby which is a reality show where they show birthmom's picking out adoptive parents and the process of giving up their child.  I think this show is actually hugely beneficial in helping many people understand the amount of strength and selflessness some of these birth mothers have - it truly astounds me.  I've always heard the side from the adoptive parents, but never the birthmothers.  It's so addicting and so moving, love that show.

Listening To: While Jason and I were in Seattle we picked up the new Matchbox 20 CD and the new Maroon 5 CD - both are amazing and I listen to them constantly.  I'm not even that big of a Matchbox 20 fan (my hubs is a die-hard), but this album might just convince me!

Thinking About: All these horrible cases of Fungal Meningitis that has been breaking out in Tennessee from tainted steroid injections that hospitals and clinics were administering here in Nashville.  There's already something like 5 deaths in our area from it and thousands have received the contaminated shot, including a woman I work with!  So freakin scary and only confirms why I try not to do anything invasive if at all possible!

Trying To Figure Out: How on earth I'm going to get my house completely cleaned and ready to go before my parents visit.  And what type of meals I'll be cooking for them!  Yesterday I made a turkey chili that was bomb.  I think my parents would really like it and might add it to the list.  So excited!

Looking Forward To: Again my parents visit next week, but also picking up our new puppy CJ on Friday!!!  Yeah!!!!!  I may or may not be planning on sneaking him into the office on Monday afternoon ;-)

Wearing:  Speaking of the office - I can't for the life of me figure out why it's so difficult to figure out the AC/Heat situation in our area of the office!  It's freezing!! And when I've had enough, I have no other choice but to bust out my Forever Lazy. 

Reading:  Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand.  I've been so busy on house projects, cleaning, starting up home group and other various things that I haven't had much time to get into this book.  It's our book club's pick for September & October and we're going to discuss it over our annual Book Club Retreat in a couple weeks ;-)  But so far I'm really enjoying it! 

Making Me Happy: My sweet husband whose patience and love continues to dumbfound me. My well-behaved pups that makes me laugh uncontrollably.  My work friends that make the day that much easier to get through and humor keeps me rolling.  My personal friends and their faithfulness and loyalty. My Father God who has blessed me abundantly.

A baby brother for Jeep & Seven!

So because Jeep & Seven are now 3 1/2 years old, we felt it was time to add another pup to the Keith family! Not only because we've heard it will keep Jeep & Seven active longer, but also because if (God-forbid) something were to happen to either of them, having a third pup around would help ease the transition and grieving for all of us.  Plus, we've just always known at some point that we were going to add a chocolate lab to the fam, so now is as good as time as any! 

I figure since I'm already cleaning up loads of dog hair - why not a little more?  I just hope Banks doesn't decide to freak out or run away from all this puppy love in our home.  Poor Banks. 

Us girls are so outnumbered.

We contacted the breeder we used for Jeep & Seven a few weeks ago, and it turns out that they were expecting a litter of chocolates this month!  

The sire's (dad) name is Jackson and the dame's (mom) name is Missy. 

                 (Jackson)                                                             (Missy - VERY pregnant)

Turns out - Jackson IS JEEP & SEVEN'S FATHER!  We always knew that Jeep & Seven's dad's name was Stonewall.  But what we didn't realize was that Stonewall's full name is Stonewall Jackson and his son's name is Stonewall Jackson Jr. (Jackson).  Thus - Stonewall was their grandfather and Jackson is their dad!  So this little guy we'll be adding to our family, is TRULY going to be a half-brother to them!  This is actually very cool, because the breeders have several dames and sires they breed, so really it was a huge surprise & blessing that we get to keep our pups all in the same family! :-)

CJ was born last Wednesday, August 22nd to a litter of 8 pups; 3 chocolate males, 1 chocolate female, 1 yellow male, and 3 black females.

A tri-liter is actually very rare, so it's kinda cool that when we go to see the litter we can see all of them together.

The breeder sent me this pic of one of the chocolate males just under 24 hours old - this could be our CJ!

Eeek!! I want to smush on him! He's sooo tiny and can't even open his eyes yet!

After talking with Jason this weekend, I would absolutely love to breed Labs if we can find us a house on some serious acreage and it would allow me to be able to work from home! I just love my boys to pieces and know that they bring so much hope and healing to the kids in our neighborhood.  It would be cool to have some of the inner city kids come to our house and spend time with the dogs, learning how to care for them, train them ect.  I know our boys have been a HUGE part of the healing process for the kids in our neighborhood, so it would be awesome to offer something like that for them.  I mean seriously, if we can get a house on like 30 acres with a creek or stream and then build a bunkhouse, we could do some weekend retreats for these boys & girls.  I'm totally dreaming right now, but I can just picture it ;-)

Stay tuned - in mid-September we pick out our CJ and I'll post pics & video of our visit to Confederate Lab Kennels in Chicamauga, Georgia!

Some Shopping & Girl Time

This last weekend, I was surprised with a visit from a couple of the girls who used to live in our neighborhood.  Jonique (on the right) has recently moved with her mom, baby sister and stepdad to the projects across town so every once in a while she comes by to visit her grandparents who still live near us.  Dominique (on the left) and her brothers were also visiting their grandma since their mom had to work Saturday.  So since it was raining and both the girls were just hanging out at our house, I offered to take the girls for a little shopping at Opry Mills Mall.  We had an absolute blast walking around, shopping and munching on cinnamon nuggets from Auntie Anne's.

Could these girls be any cuter? 

They picked out some fun things to buy and I got some great ideas for their upcoming birthdays ;-)

They were so polite and very appreciative, which makes hanging out with them that much more enjoyable! We had fun and will defintely have to go again sometime!

My New Obsession - GlossyBox June 2012

So I'm becoming obsessed with all things face/hair/skin products. I've always enjoyed makeup and can remember how fun it was as a little girl to dig through my aunt's collection of Mary Kay while visiting at her house. But because of how expensive trying out new products can often get, I rarely try something outside of the box! (no pun intended) Back in my single days, I would save up for a weekend trip to Vancouver BC with my sisters and splurge on MAC and Lush products.

It not only saved me money with the currency exchange, but the rush I would get from buying all these yummy smelling and sparkly pretties would keep my adrenaline going for days. Since I've been married and now living in Nashville, it's pretty much been a drugstore budget ever since. And there's just nothing worse than realizing you've blown $12 on a sucky foundation or mascara. Ugh. So I do what I do best and I started researching. I was reading makeupalley.com all the time and taking notes of the best reviewed products out there. Then I discovered the lovely ladies of YouTube with all their eye-opening insight to proper application, tips and tricks. I was HOOKED. While visiting one of these ladie's YouTube channel (Imogen of Foxy Locks), I saw her review on a monthly subscription service called GlossyBox.  She's actually in the UK, so I quickly googled to find out if there was anything like this in the U.S.  Sho-nuff!  I was able to get on the waiting list before it was even started here, and within a few weeks I received my first Glossybox!!

Isn't it pretty?! It seriously comes all wrapped up just like that! Love!

It didn't take much, because now I'm completely smitten with this service!  My first box arrived like this:

In it I received the following 5 Sample/Travel/Full Size high-end products to try out, along with 1 bonus item:

1. ShowOff Mascara by BeautyAddicts - valued at $22 (full size included - .39 oz.)

Review: I freakin love this mascara.  It stays all day, doesn't smudge or flake and is super rich and moisturizing to my lashes, which probably has something to do with the argan oil in it. Some ladies really complained about the clumping issue - and quite honestly the way the tube & brush is designed, a lot is left on the wand and unless you scrape the excess back into the tube, it will clump all over the place. But it is soooo worth it.  I would definitely repurchase again.

2. Marula Whipped Shea Butter Body Creme by SheaTerra Organics (Included sample size - 1 oz) - $18.00 for regular size (9oz.)

Review:  This stuff looks like creamy Avocado, and smells like heaven. I could eat it with a spoon. And a little goes a long way, so seriously the sample size is more than enough to decide if you like it.  I have a ton left and love that I can keep it in my desk or in my purse. It smells like buttery pecans and almonds.  Yuuuuum. Yet another product I was seriously happy about and totally love.  They have a white chocolate hand/body cream that I just might have to order soon!

3. Enrich Moisturizing Treatment by Wella Professionals (Included sample size - .84 oz)  $12.00 for regular size (5.07oz)

Review: Again, a winner!! I got three uses out of this little sample and I really enjoyed it!  It smelled wonderful, moisturized really well and was suited perfectly for my fine hair.  It didn't weigh my hair down, left no reside and my hair was so soft that I would walk around the office asking my friends to feel it.  I would repurchase this again as well.  Highly recommend!

4  Restructure Firming Cream by Kinerase (Included sample size .24 oz) $98.00 for regular size (1.7 oz)

Review.  Um, what the heck? Seriously what exactly am I restructuring with this stuff? I've used a few times now and there's still a lot left in the sample, and it doesn't smell that great and I don't notice any difference. Not really sure what I'm supposed to be noticing anyway and there's no way in hell I'm paying $98.00 for a full size pot of this.  I guess it's for creating collagen and firming around the eyes, reducing wrinkles, blah, blah, blah. Not a fan.

5. Smooth Shave Cream by First Aid Beauty $7.50 (Included full size - 2 oz).

Review: Again, kinda meh about this one.  Cute packaging, smelled decent enough, pretty shimmery shave lotion, but really didn't think it did that great of a job.  Quite honestly, it was so slick that it didn't really stick to my skin, it just kinda slid off which was so pointless when trying to shave. Not a fav and won't be repurchasing.

* Bonus Sample - Urban Organic Perfume Sample by A Perfume Organic (Included sample size - vial 1 ml.)  $65.00 for full size roll-on bottle (12ml.)

Review:  Honestly (I'll always be honest on these reviews), it smelled like a hippy with dirty socks on.  Blech! Nuff said.

When you sign up with GlossyBox you fill out a personal profile indicating your style, preferences and skin/hair type.  So far everything they've sent me has been right on the money. That doesn't necessarily mean I've loved everything, but there's nothing that I haven't been able to test out or doesn't fit my style & preferences.  You pay $21 a month and they select out of a variety of samples and sometimes full-size products 4 items for your box and throw in a bonus free sample. Some items that I did not receive in my box are the following:

1. Mineral Botanic Hibiscus & Fig Velvet Cream Wash by Ahava (Sample Size - 3 oz) valued at $22 for full size (17 oz). (Actually glad I didn't receive this one, since many folks received theirs spilled all over their box. Yikes.)

2. Eye Shadow Ice by Ofra Cosmetics (Sample Size - 14 ml.) valued at $17.50 for full size (.47 oz) (None of these colors are really me, so I'm glad I didn't receive this one either - it's like they read my mind!)

3. Lite Up & Buying Time & Eye Never by VBeaute valued at $150.00 (Lite Up) for full size (1.0 oz); $135.00 (Buying Time) for full size (1.7 oz); $85.00 (Eye Never) for full size (0.5 oz) The sample sizes were little tubes (.033 oz each). (Again, I would never purchase this stuff at full price anyway - HOLY CRAP $150.00?!?!, so I don't mind not receiving this either.)

So there's my first review of GlossyBox!  July's GlossyBox review coming up soon!

*The products in this review was provided specifically for the purpose of writing a review. This in no way effects the quality of the review provided. No monetary exchange occurred in exchange for the writing of the review. The views expressed in this review are strictly that of the reviewer. All reviews provided here are the work of the reviewer and remain completely unbiased. *